tem dias que a gente só quer deitar na cama e chorar

Sometimes I need you more than I can even understand. Sometimes I miss you so much that it makes me go running to meet you. Sometimes it seems like you're the only one who notices me, that sees me when I'm invisible. There's something about you that sometimes makes me want you so that I'd never let you go away. Not that you feel tha same, but sometimes I feel like this about you.. but just sometimes.

"I'm weird 'cause i hate goodbyes"

Acho que já disse milhares de "tchaus":
o que estamos acostumados a dizer;
o primeiro pra uma pessoa que a gente acabou de conhecer;
o que a gente repete várias vezes porque sempre aparece algo para dizer depois;
o que a gente repete várias vezes porque a pessoa não entendeu que a gente que ir;
o que vem sempre acompanhado de um "eu te amo";
o que queria vir acompanhado de um "eu te amo";
o que a gente tá louco pra dizer porque realmente quer ir embora;
o que a gente demora o máximo pra dizer porque não quer ir embora;
o que a gente diz sabendo que vai dizer isso de novo para a mesma pessoa;
o que a gente diz sem saber se é o último que vai dizer para aquela pessoa;
o que a gente não queria que tivesse sido o último;
o que a gente sabe que vai demorar pra dizer de novo para a pessoa, mas sabe que vai dizer;
o que a gente dá pra um semi-conhecido/desconhecido;
o que a gente dá pra uma pessoa que nos conhece muito bem;
o que vem com um abraço muito bom;
o que vem com um abraço e um empurrão;
o que parte nosso coração ao dizer;
o que vem com lágrimas;
entre outros..

e no final, eu descobri que ainda não sei me despedir.

i wish i could open my heart as book, so everyone could understand what i feel. but i know, at the same time, that there's no words to what i feel,so, in that way the book would have to be with only images. but i'm not sure if those would pretty and easy to understand images. and i know nobody would want to read it, so i just keep it as locked up as cheast that the very owner doesn't know where he left the key.

It's hard to sit back and watch your life pass by, while everyone is enjoying it and replacing you. It hurts the most that I have this bunch of feeling that I can't share 'cause I'm just not able to do it, and 'cause I know people would think I'm stupid :/

memories are the only things we can hold on to. but memories can be so comforting and so destructive at the same time. and then we think new memories are going to make us forget the old ones, but they don't. we keep reminiscing for ever

eu vi no tumblr "you were so fucking great" e pensei:

you were so fucking great.. WE were so fucking great.
I don't get it. I don't get why we can't be fucking great again

sometimes i wonder if i disappeared people would notice it

i kind of think they won't

some things are simply worthless but you rather pretend they're not - that's called hope- so you can feel ok for a little bit, but when reality hits you, it hits hard and harder than you thought. it hurts

you're not mine, you'll never be. and i'm sorry for that, it's all i can be

i need you to find out the best part of me, 'cause i'm starting to think i don't have a good one anymore :/

things i wrote and never posted

09/02/2011

eu não me importo em não ser. na verdade, quero mais que ser, mais que existir, muito mais que sentir. queria que pudessem existir várias de mim, perdidas por aí, numa louca viagem. queria ser estrela, ou até mesmo lua. queria poder navegar por onde não conheço,mas tenho algemas me prendendo. queria poder voar, explodir, desaparecer. quero mais que ser. muito mais que ser eu.

20/02/11

people don't get that when something makes me feel good i wanna do it all over again, a thousand freaking times. so they just get annoyed by me and make me hide/forget the thins that make me feel good.

i like you and i like even more that i don't like you :)


but


i don't like that a lie i heard made me feel bad..


no, bia, you're talking about different people

You hurt me and you don't even know that. It should be illegal to miss people, specially when they are next to you.

All I ask is for you to get the fuck out of my life. Why is it so hard? I'm trying to move on. You just try so hard to fuck up my life, and you barely know that you don't even need to try so much, you hurt me just because you exist.
All I asked was for you to get the fuck out of my life. Is it so hard?

be careful with your wishes, they might come true.
i've only wanted to forget who doesn't deserve to be remembered. i never said i wanted to fall in love with another problem. i hate those butterflies and those little stupid memories. i hate it so bad. if this is having a crush, i don't like it. ii don't want it.

eu AMO escrever


colocar no papel um sentimento
que muitas vezes é tão abstrato que me faltam palavras
mas é a tinta da caneta na folha, que diz o que eu tô sentindo
mas até do que o que eu escrevo

eu devia estar:
arrumando a mala
postando no outro blog
ligando pra bruna


mas eu estou animada e feliz (:
então, beijocas

I have to think.

but, yeah, i have (as always) too much on my mind. JESUS, why can't this just be over? you know? all the doubts i have. sometimes i wish i could get in the shower and let the water wash me away, like i would dissolve from being so long in the shower. i guess, that's how i feel.

um, dois, três.. testando.

on my mind:

- he's gone.
- she said you could have him
- you would never really have a chance with him
- i want the convenção to stay forever
- i want to go to italy :(
- the fact he talked to me made me feel a little beter
- maybe he still cares
- he's just an asshole, idiot, stupid, twat, wanker..
- am i difficult?
- is it all worth?
- hey.
- will i, in a few years, be able to remember who i'm talking about and that i'm talking about to different "he"s ?

I like doing this thing I do, you know? like, being the way I am with him. In the end, I'm just having fun with his face, even if he's getting all wrong, I'm still laughing, so, it's not bad, is it?
I like "playing", if we can call it playing.



I'm just thinking, ok?

dramin, how effective you are. i love you for making me sleep.
thanks
bia

I have so much in my mind. Stuff is happening and I don't even know what to do with myself.


I seriously wish she would stop lying and saying that she cares and still loves me, 'cause we both know we are barely friends now. :/

Happy New (fucking) Year, right?

can you believe it's 2011? no? yeah, me either. but it's like "hey, it's just a normal day" and we don't get to work, but yeah, i don't work, + i'm on summer break AND it's a saturday! so what ever, hey, it's new decade! yes, that's nice but it's the same life. i think people believe too much in time/date change and less in self change. it all start with us.