por que sempre que eu vou sair, eu desanimo?

procura por uma resposta

i close my eyes and leave myself to float through the piano keys and the beatiful melody that comes to me in waves.

so, today i found out that i still have some angels around.
a special person is looking over me and i didn't know until today. she's been reading all the crap i put here. hey there, kawa. i miss you <3

When I'm down I drive the hearse

And pride is just another way
Of trying to live with my mistakes

Denial is a better way
Of getting through another day

And silence is another way
Of saying what I wanna say

And lying is another way
Of hoping it will go away

And you were always my mistake...


Porcupine Tree

I saw our picture today. It's funny to think that not long ago we didn't have to find excuses to talk to each other. I mean, we could just talk and talk, and talk for hours. Now, we are speechless when it comes to have a conversation. So we keep finding excuses to keep talking but still not admiting we miss each other.

hey t = hate

I hate how some people are sure that i'll always be there for them, even if they don't deserve.
I hate more how stupid i am for being there for them even if they don't care about me.

i'm not very sure if reading all this effing shit makes me feel any better. actually, i know it'll only make me sink more and more. but does it matter now? take a pill and dig your hole, sunshine. that's why we are here. and i only regret for being so nice and so kind to people who don't give a shit about me. that's all. take a pill sunshine 'cause i'll start to dig my hole when i finish typing.

that's when i want to turn off all this damn shit i have to make me "connected" to this damn world and just disappear. i kind of wish that someone would notice, but then, i realize that no one is going to fucking miss me, and that i'll just be hurting my fucking self again. but wait, i'm doing it right now, while i'm talking to people. i guess i'm just fucked up.

thanks, sunshinhes (: (maybe not)

o tenso é quando o som das batidas de coração no final de "eclipse" somem. aí você percebe que você tá total vazio.

whatever you like

eu queria ser uma daquelas pessoas que olha pra os outros e fala 'foda-se', assim fácil, fácil. pena que eu não sou.

mas entenda, "no wise words gonna stop the bleeding", não que eu esteja "bleeding", mas desculpa não melhora humor e não pedir desculpa, pior ainda. anyways, dormir é mais interessante do que essa porcaria (vulgo: vida)

+ if you know you're doing or saying something you may regret later, just don't fucking do it. don't wait people to call you stupid, to realize you were. fucking hell.

e se você valoriza alguém, não os afaste de você com palavras ou gestos. não afaste as pessoa que gostam de você ou que você gosta de você.

boa noite.

oh well

it should be illegal to miss someone like i miss him. it's so fucked up.
this weekend it flashed up on my mind how it would be if he was here. it's so fucked up (2)
OH, DEAR LORD, i fucking miss him, i just don't wanna admit it D:

..

"Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars?"

Oh, dear lord,

give me strength to not to care, please. that's all I ask, 'cause I can't handle this anymore.

love,

Bia